Halo People

Halo. Halo. Halo.
How have you been doing?
Everything fine?
Me?

I am having this problem. Guess what. Whenever I thought of blogging a freaking long-winded with zero content bloggie, I will ended up with short post. *frown


Rite.
I owe you and myself an answer at "How am I doing?"
I always wanted to find out myself at HOW AM I DOING? Like seriously.
M having routine life recently and I m kinda numb with my job scope myself already.


A lot of things happened during the past few months but I can't really recall if you asked me to list out everything now. I tried my best to blog every single thing here, but, as time goes by, I think I have become more and more reserve OR maybe I am numb with everything that happened around me and I don't think I should jot those down. Think you actually noticed all these by seeing my blogs becoming shorter & shorter.


I might have changed, but, I don't really noticed myself. (This is where I will need you, my friend, to tell me at how I've actually changed. be its good or bad) I am pretty sure that there's one thing that is still with me, where I have never ever changed - I always drown myself in the cyber space. From SMS, ICQ, MSN, Facebook, Whats Apps and etc. (yes I know you are smiling & shaking your head) I just couldn't control myself by looking & drowning in the screen despite I am outside with great fun frenz. Poeple will find myself not outspoken in person but they will actually find another active me at the outer space. Okay. This sounds a bit weird, as if I am abnormal(owh maybe I am really weird) but well, even myself couldn't explain, WHY, I will react like that. I mean why I can be very talkative and active at the cyber space but I will be different when I meet you in real person. Alright, maybe that's the reason why I like to drown myself in outer space, because I can find the real me in the outer space - being naughty, talkative and etc.AND that made me owning a bloggie, a place where I can express my feelings without getting any real-time feedback via faces. (Right right, I am crapping shit again)


Coolness. I've written quite a long blog. Ok. Let's continue. BAH.
How AM I DOING. Can I say its sucks?
Let me tell you WHY.
Okies. As I am "growing", and have experienced quater of the century(gosh...I am THAT OLD already), there are more and more things that I will need to deal with. I've been trained to think a lot, but, at the same time, more and more responsibility falls on me, and, I don't feel comfortable to have my boss trusting me so so much by letting myself leading or guiding something. Okay. I know I should be doing all these already, but, I admit, I am NOT independent at all and I seriously think that I am NOT ready for all these. I wish I could live in Neverland nao. =( Rite. I m still leaving in my small small little kiddy world where not much responsibility needed, not much things that I will need to commit with.(Even my frens, kelics still think I am CUTE instead of sexy or pretty, like, WTH I am already 25 but still look CUTE, should I be happy or sad? LOL)


I noticed, as we grow, freedom have become lesser & lesser. (hands up if you agree) Is that a way of showing maturity, OR, is that a way that made us to be more stable & mature? If yes, it is really expensive to pay my freedom to gain maturity. (Oh gosh, but I like mature people).Should I put equalization between mature and less active? Okay. Listen to my explanation. People who are mature will club/pub less(or maybe don't club), will go out late less(maybe will always stay home after work), will be even more anti-social(as social will be like a JOB than FUN), and of all, as you grow older, you will have more and more commitment, more and more debt. to pay, and that made you choose to stay at home to avoid all those unnecessary spendings(as you have already pay of pile of your money to all the debts) Okay. Okay. Maybe all the mentioned above only eligible to apply on the responsible person. Oh well. I m crapping again. I know we can't judge a people's maturity by looking at their age. Different people will have different thought & exposure to the world that made them to have different maturity level, despite they are at the same age. Hence the sentence "1 type of rice feed thousand kind of people".


See? I always debate within myself when I list out the facts and this made me think what I said is only crap. I always have this very weak sense in judging what's right, what's wrong, what's yes, what's no. That's all because I was taught to think like "there's no right answer in this world". AND I always believe, different people will have different thought that lead to different ways on judging what's right and what's not.


So in this post, you can see a very dual-personality me.
That's me, that's me.
Maybe I am really abnormal. =="


Okayz. Enought of crapz today. Off for movie nao =D


Written @ 1U, Starbucks, 2100.
Sincerely,
miao